Today has been a hard day for me. I’ve been very anxious today. I hate it. What I find difficult is that sometimes I feel like there is no good reason to feel anxious, today is hardly different from yesterday or the day before, but the anxiety I feel is much more intense and uncomfortable. It’s like I’m a magnet and I am picking up pieces and shards of anxiety from all around me. Particles are floating all around and today is the day they are attracted to the kind of magnet that I am. Or perhaps I am an emotional sponge, absorbing the collective anxiety that we are all feeling right now. I know I am an HSP, a highly sensitive person. I am an empath. I need a protective force field that won’t allow of this energy in. It’s too much. The anxiety does not always have a name or feel very specific, it just is. The volume is turned way up. I hate it and I feel very sad.

I feel that during this time of covid, I have noticed the anxiety that I feel comes in waves. It ebbs and flows. Much of the time I feel fine, OK, sometimes numb, then there are days like today where the anxiety is all that I can feel and see. I know it will pass and I still fucking hate it.

I realized today that I have not been meditating everyday and I have not been doing as much yoga. I have to get back to these things and not neglect to do them. They make a big difference in my life.

I hope you are OK. I hope you are not feeling so sad or anxious. I am sending you love.

puh-puh-puh